Women initiate more than 63% of divorces in the UK. Here’s why this matters

Find out why women are more likely to initiate divorces than men and discover three tips to help you understand and support your female clients' unique needs.

According to the Office for National Statistics (ONS; 2 November 2022), in 2021, women initiated 63.1% of divorces among opposite-sex couples in the UK.

While it might appear that female clients who are leading their divorces are fully aware of their circumstances and needs, they’re likely to have unique needs that require careful and specific support.

Read on to learn more about why women initiate divorce proceedings more often than men. Then discover some practical tips for understanding the “why” behind your divorcing female clients’ needs and concerns, to help you provide the personalised support they need.

Emotional, social, and financial factors might contribute to a woman’s decision to divorce

The BBC Family Tree (13 May 2022) has suggested several possible reasons why women are disproportionately initiating divorce:

• Women are usually socialised to have a higher emotional intelligence than men – As a result, women may be more likely to feel that their needs are unmet, and they might be more attuned to relationship “red flags”.
• Women tend to gain fewer benefits from marriage – Married men often live longer and earn more money than single men. In contrast, married women often bear the majority of household and child-rearing responsibilities, which can lead to feelings of stress and overwhelm.
• Women often have more close friends than men – Having a strong support system in place could help women take control of their marital issues and ease the transition to a single life.
• Women are awarded custody of children in the majority of divorces – This could provide valuable reassurance to a woman who is contemplating a separation and give them the confidence to initiate a divorce.
• Women may be more motivated to formalise a separation – Not all women who initiate a divorce have chosen to end their relationship. Yet, they may have a pressing need to resolve their marital status so that they can reach a financial settlement with their ex-spouse.

However, if you have female clients who are going through a divorce, they will likely have individual concerns that might inform the type and level of support they need from you.

Women who initiate divorce may have unique needs

It might be tempting to make assumptions about clients who initiate divorce, such as, “they know what they want”, “they’re in control”, and so on. Yet, it’s crucial to look at each client as an individual with unique needs.

While you may have female clients who are adamant that they want a divorce, they may not have thought through all the practicalities. What’s more, they might not be aware of all the options available to them.

Here are some crucial factors to pay attention to when working with female clients who are going through a divorce.

The gender pension gap

Figures published in Scottish Widows’ Women and Retirement Report 2023, reveal that at least 60% of divorced women did not discuss pension assets during their divorce. The most common reason for this was a misconception that pension assets were not part of proceedings.

Unfortunately, not including pension assets in a divorce settlement could jeopardise your female clients’ long-term financial security. This is because men on average have larger pension pots to draw on when they retire than women. According to the most recent government data (5 June 2023), the current gender pension gap is 35%, or 32% for those who are eligible for auto-enrolment.

The gender pension gap – the percentage difference in income between men’s and women’s pensions – could affect your female client’s financial wellbeing and lifestyle in retirement.

The chart below, published by Scottish Widows, illustrates the significant difference between projected retirement outcomes for men and women.

 Click here to view

Source: Scottish Widows (2023)

This data reveals that just 30% of women are on track to achieve a “comfortable” lifestyle in retirement, compared to 41% of men.

What’s more, single women and mothers are at the greatest risk of poor retirement outcomes.

Click here to view

Source: Scottish Widows (2023)

As you can see, 66% of single women and 75% of single mothers are forecast to have less than a “minimum lifestyle” when they retire, compared to 39% of all women.

So, women who initiate divorce may be in a very different position financially than men who do likewise. As a result, it’s crucial that your female divorcing clients consider their pension assets and those of their ex-spouse when discussing a financial settlement.

As a financial expert who specialises in supporting divorcing women, I can use cashflow modelling to forecast different financial scenarios and help your clients choose the most suitable pension sharing option for their circumstances and goals.

Read more: Why a Pension Sharing Order could be essential if you're getting divorced

The effect of childcare on women’s careers

While women are now an established part of the UK workforce, the Scottish Widows report shows that on average, women still do far more childcare than men.

In opposite-sex couples, 56% of mothers said they do the majority of the childcare, compared to just 11% of fathers. Further, 44% of mothers spend all five working days looking after their children, compared to 16% of fathers.

Unsurprisingly, the extra time many women spend on parenting can affect their careers.

The graph below shows that women typically take significantly more paid parental leave than men. This is usually because men often aren’t paid paternity leave in the same way as women are offered maternity leave.

Click here to view 

Source: Scottish Widows (2023).

If your female clients have taken considerable time off work to care for their children, this could potentially affect their career progression opportunities and future earnings.

In turn, this may also exacerbate the gender pension gap discussed above, as lower earnings usually result in lower pension contributions over a lifetime.

So, your female clients who have filed for divorce may face unique financial challenges, in the short- and long-term, that require careful consideration and planning.

3 tips for understanding the “why” behind your clients’ needs and concerns

Understanding your divorcing female clients’ motivations, needs, and concerns could help you provide the support they need efficiently and empathetically.

Here are three practical tips for uncovering your clients’ “why” – that is, their key motivations and aspirations:

1. Create a safe space where your clients feel comfortable talking openly – Your clients may find it difficult to discuss the breakdown of their relationship at first. Building trust and creating a space in which your clients feel safe sharing their feelings honestly could help you learn more about what they’re hoping to achieve.
2. Encourage your clients to talk to the people close to them – Initiating a divorce might leave your clients feeling conflicted and uncertain about their futures. Talking to close friends and family could help them clarify their needs and make them feel more confident about discussing these in a more formal context with you and other professionals.
3. Work closely with your professional connections – Navigating a divorce requires the insight and expertise of various professionals. In the early stages of a divorce, your clients may feel confused about their motivations and ambitions. Putting your clients in touch with different sources of help – financial experts, counsellors, and so on – could help them to identify and articulate their unique needs.

Get in touch

If you have clients who could benefit from working with a qualified and empathetic female divorce expert, they can find me at lottie@truefinancialdesign.co.uk or call 07824 554288.

I am also happy to discuss cases with solicitors first, before you refer your clients to me, or you can contact me by email and CC your client accordingly. I am happy to accommodate whatever mode of communication works best for you and your clients.

Please note

This article is for general information only and does not constitute advice. The information is aimed at retail clients only.

Please do not act based on anything you might read in this article. All contents are based on our understanding of HMRC legislation, which is subject to change.

The Financial Conduct Authority does not regulate cashflow planning.

A pension is a long-term investment not normally accessible until 55 (57 from April 2028). The fund value may fluctuate and can go down, which would have an impact on the level of pension benefits available. Past performance is not a reliable indicator of future performance. 

The tax implications of pension withdrawals will be based on your individual circumstances. Thresholds, percentage rates, and tax legislation may change in subsequent Finance Acts.